Life in Texas

Updates

2008-08-11T07:47:00.002-05:00

Figured I better make a post to keep this blog alive.

I haven't lost anymore weight. We've had an exceptionally tough year - my mother in law died April 1, our house burned to the ground April 12, and my father died on May 31. My band was so tight due to stress that I had the fill removed. After about 6 wks (and 10 lbs gained), I had it put back in...just in time for my marriage to start getting shaky. All is well now, but that caused my band to get tight again and about the only things I can get down and keep down are the bad foods.

The marriage is back on track, so hopefully, my band will settle down and I can start losing weight again. I don't own a scale yet, so I have no idea how much damage has been done :(

I'm losing again!

2008-02-02T19:35:00.000-06:00

After several months of fighting...I finally gave in and got a fill. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, so I just wouldn't get a fill, and of course, started gaining weight. I gained about 6 lbs and said enough, so I went in the beginning of January, and since then I've gone from 183 to 175.4! They want me in once a month from now on to monitor me better, so maybe I'll make goal yet!

Just a quickie update...I really haven't forgotten people are checking ;)

Update

2007-10-02T07:46:00.000-05:00

I've gotten a lot of emails requesting an update, so here we are.

I haven't been updating the blog because I simply haven't been losing weight. I got down to 178 and haven't budged since - well, nothing lower, although occasionally I jump back up to 180, 181, and then lose again.

I need to be exercising, but my job has become so stressful that I'm just exhausted and numb when I get home - all I want to do is veg.

I had to have a slight unfill last month, and I know I need to be refilled because I'm eating way more than I should be able to, but if I get refilled, I'll get sick over everything I eat.

Ya know, if you're reading this and thinking about lapband surgery, don't let it discourage you. I'm in a very small percentage of people who apparently don't tolerate the band well. The bottom line though is that I HAVE lost 55 lbs, and while still slightly over weight (25 lbs), it's better than being 90 lbs overweight!

I'm a little discouraged, but I've maintained for awhile now that I'm ok being where I am with my weight, and Scott is happy with it, so that works for me. :)

Please take a moment...

2007-09-10T18:18:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow morning, to remember those who died on September 11, 2001

The scale is moving!

2007-07-30T05:28:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 179.0
Total lost: 55.5

Triple 5s baby! 55.5 lbs down. My fill is one week old and I've lost another pound, finally. Of course, I'm having some food issues (PBing again), but not too badly. I can live with it, just find myself having to do liquids every other day or so. But that's fine as long as the scale is moving again!

A little bitty fill on 7/24

2007-07-25T19:58:00.000-05:00

I saw Dr. B yesterday, who seemed very pleased with my progress, despite the fact that I haven't lost much weight in the past 2 months. He said I definitely needed a fill, but given my history with fills, that didn't thrill me. He said it would be just a tiny one, and it was...only .1cc. So far, it seems good...I did liquids for 24 hours and am now doing mushies, but am back to only eating about 1/2 of a cup. YAY!

Five months post op yesterday

2007-07-15T19:35:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 180.0
Total lost: 54.5

It's been exactly five months yesterday since my surgery. I'm frustrated because I feel like I should have lost more weight than this, and I simply cannot break into the 170s.

I definitely need a fill, but I'm definitely not getting one. I'm still having PB issues, just not as frequently, but I can't see walking in and asking for a .1cc fill...lol...could you imagine the reaction? And really, I wouldn't want any more than that. We'll see how it goes over the next couple of weeks. If I'm truly stuck (and geez, like only a 3 lb loss in the past month isn't stuck?), I'll consider it.

I'm down low enough that I can wear a bikini...maybe I shouldn't, but oh frigging well. I'm comfortable in a regular 14...not 14W, they're too big. Let us not forget that Marilyn Monroe was a size 14 ;)

So...ok where I am, and hope that someday I'll get to goal, but I'm not going to stress over it. With all the issues I've had in the past, this is a great place to be :)

However, I have had to really start upping my vitamin intake, and I'm taking a B-Complex and B-12...my hair is falling out at an incredible rate. It almost nauseates me in the morning when I brush my hair! I just started taking the B's yesterday, so I'm really hoping it helps, and I bought some protein bars today with 32g of protein. I also intend to buy those New Whey tubes with 42g of protein. Between the two, that's 74g of protein a day...hopefully, this will all help!

How long has it been anyway? 17 wks post op

2007-06-17T20:50:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 183.0
Total lost: 51.5

The scale has finally started moving again, but very slowly. I've upped my protein and calories considerably this week, and I do believe it's made a difference.

Still PBing a lot, and in fact, when I don't get sick for a full day, it is a very good day. Two days go by without getting sick and I start wondering if I need a fill. Don't worry, there isn't one in my future at the moment. I literally can't imagine getting one, and suspect that as quickly as the weight came off at first, I'm just catching up to myself now.

Scott says he can't imagine me losing another 30 lbs, but I am still obviously "a little" overweight, so I'm not done yet. I'm fitting into most 14s comfortably, but haven't even attempted any 12s yet...I'm not even close.

My hair is falling out by the handfuls. I know it'll stop eventually, but DAMN, it's a lot of hair. Thank God my hair is very thick, or I'd be bald.

I keep saying that I need to start doing ab crunches, and yesterday, I found one of my ab CDs, so really, I don't have any excuse not to. I hereby make a goal to start tomorrow night after work.

sigh

2007-06-09T07:35:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 187.6
Total lost: 46.9

OK, so here we are, almost 4 months post op. I've been gaining and losing the same 2 lbs since May. By my actions, it would appear that I need another fill (grazing, looking for food). But some days, I get sick on 2 or 3 bites of something, and other days I can eat more food than I should be able to - like last weekend, I think I ate something like 5 BBQ spareribs, and this week, I ate an entire Lean Cuisine meal (pasta, broccoli and chicken) and didn't hiccup once.

I can't figure out a pattern, because sometimes I can eat something on Monday, and on Tuesday the exact same food will make me sick.

I can't stand the idea of getting another fill. I'm getting sick so often that the idea of closing my stoma up more scares the hell out of me. I'll be living on soup and mushies if I do. I DO intend to make a regular (non-fill) appointment with my doctor, just because it's time (he wants to see me once a month, regardless of any issues) and maybe he'll have some ideas.

The good news is, at 187 lbs, I do feel better about myself. Being only 37 lbs overweight is a lot better than being 87 lbs overweight. If I don't lose any more weight, I'll be ok...not great, but ok.

I AM getting more exercise. My office moved up a floor in our building, and I started having to park a block away. So I'm now having to walk that block twice a day, plus run three flights of stairs each way. Also, my new cubicle is a lot further from the door than it used to be, so taking my breaks involves walking approximately a block by the time it's all said and done. I'm hoping the weight stall is because I'm gaining muscle weight.

So, that's where I am at the moment.

13 weeks post op...a little late!

2007-05-23T20:16:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 189.6
Total lost: 44.9

Up a pound last Sunday, and haven't budged since. I got a fill yesterday. At the last fill, they said they put in .6cc, but they pulled .7cc yesterday, and then added .2cc more, so I'm up to .9cc. I didn't think it was working until I sat down to dinner tonight...OMG...I ate maybe half a cup of food and I'm stuffed. In fact, I took just "one more bite" and ended up with a quick PB...obviously, that was too much. I'm really hoping this will put me back on the road to losing, since I've only lost 5.2 lbs in the past 31 days.

We'll find out Sunday!

12 weeks post op

2007-05-13T21:38:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 188.6
Total lost: 45.9

I'm getting very excited about the amount of weight I've lost!! We spent today out at Six Flags, so I'm sure I've walked at least four miles, but of course, I managed to eat quite a bit of junk too - a piece of fudge, a scoop of ice cream, half a chicken egg roll, a few bites of turkey leg - I'm sure I'll be back up to 190 tomorrow, but I know it's temporary :)

It is so awesome that I did all that walking and went up and down stairs, and my knees don't hurt, and really, other than a little leg soreness, I feel great!

It may be finicky, and oh so fickle, but I love having this band!

Just a quick update

2007-05-09T12:49:00.000-05:00

My band is fine!

They put a .6cc fill in and everything has been fine, so far. The fill nurse said that .6 seemed tight enough to her and it was under fluroscope, so I'm taking her word for it - even if it does seem a tad too lose to me. I'll give it a couple of weeks and then go in and get .2 or .25.

I haven't really lost any weight either since Monday, when they put the fill in. But then too, I seem to lose my weight on the weekends ;)

11 weeks post op

2007-05-06T06:19:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 190.4
Total lost: 44.1

Well, I'm just ounces away from 50% to my goal weight of 145, although honestly, that may need to be upped to 150-155. I won't know for sure until I get there.

I only lost a little over a pound this week, but still, I lost. My fill is tomorrow morning, and while I'm not entirely sure that I need it, after last weekend, my biggest concern is whether or not my band has slipped, so I'm still going in. I've had some odd pains in the port region this week, and also had a couple of very minor PB episodes, but I think those were because I ate too fast.

I got into my size 14 jeans this weekend and that was pretty exciting! In fact, size 14 was as low as I got on Nutrisystem. These are stretch jeans though, so I'll probably be in them for quite awhile. I do have a few size 12s waiting for me...they were given to me by someone on the NS boards a couple of years ago.

I'll be posting pictures later today.

Better late than never

2007-05-01T20:40:00.000-05:00

Got my camera working right, finally! Here's a picture of me before my boss' wedding on 3/31. I was down roughly 30-32 lbs. at the time.

Also, I'm scheduled for a fill under fluroscope on Monday at 8:00 a.m. I'll tell them that the max I want is .8, and let them go from there.

It sure is nice to not be choking on everything I eat!

10 Rough Weeks Post-Op

2007-04-29T08:42:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 191.8
Total lost: 42.7

Don't know what I can say at this point, that I haven't already said.

I got on the scales this morning and saw 191.8, but I'm positive it won't last, especially with me wide open. I did take advantage of being open last night and had some of my queso and chips, and may have some today, but I resolve that tomorrow and thereafter, I will eat as minimally as possible, and hopefully won't gain much. But I'm treating today like a vacation :)

CRAP!

2007-04-28T14:25:00.000-05:00

WHY is this so freaking hard for me?!?!

I accidentally took a gulp of my coffee this morning, and have been PBing since. I believe I'm so swollen that I can't even keep my saliva down. I called Dr. B's office and got the "on-call" number. The on-call doctor (whose name I missed) said he's actually coming out this way today and is going to try to work out something where he can meet up with me and do an unfill. I told him I didn't care if he did it in the backseat of the car!

I mentioned to him my fill history and he said that he's known several people who could only get .25cc at a time. I think I'm probably one of them. Getting .5cc just seems to be too much for me. I don't know if he's going to completely unfill me (hope not!) or just take out .25cc.

Just hope he hurries. It's already 2:30p.m.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
Update: I met Dr. Felts and his lovely wife at 6:15 at a gas station in Terrell. He had offered to make a house call, but really, I didn't feel right taking him another 40 minutes out of his way (20 coming/20 going), so I just met him there. He had me sit on the tailgate and did the unfill there. He took all of it out - I'm wide open. He told me to call the office on Monday and set an appointment for the following Monday, and to have them put .8cc in only, and that from now on, I shouldn't get a fill of more than .3. They sat there while I drank down a quarter of a bottle of water to make sure everything was ok, and it was.

I came home, and had dinner, and I feel terrific now, except that I can't get as much water down as I want! :)

Fill me up!

2007-04-26T21:01:00.000-05:00

I got a fill today! They pulled .6cc out of it, and added .5cc more, so I now have 1.1cc in me. When it came time to drink the water, I got really gassy, and was worried it wouldn't go down, but it did, and I have since had two Soups at Hand, one for lunch and one for dinner. Tomorrow, we'll try mushies.

They (AIGB, not Dr. B's office) were very impressed that I've dropped 14 lbs since I was last in their office on March 15, and at first hesitated on whether I should have a fill...until I told them I was already up 2 lbs this week, starving, and looking for anything in the world to eat. Those were the magic words apparently, because out came the needle.

All in all, this visit went much better than the last one! LOL...I absolutely have restriction, I'm just barely hungry. Hopefully, I'll come out with a loss this week :)

OH...about my foot - it's not a neuroma. My chiropractor, who I needed to see this week, gave my foot an adjustment and now I can walk almost 2 miles completely pain free :)

9 weeks post-op

2007-04-22T19:11:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 194.8
Total lost: 39.7

I really need a fill, but I think I'm going to put it off. Once again, have spent most of the weekend sick, and it's really taking a toll on me. I've spent the last two weekends sleeping most of the day away, after being sick on Friday nights. I'm having a hard time getting down anything remotely healthy, but chips, ice cream, a freaking bagel dog....all the junk food, goes down and stays down. That makes NO sense to me!

I did manage to lose one pound this week, after gaining two and losing three. More evidence I need a fill.

I tried walking the other day and got a pain in my left foot. So I went yesterday and bought a new pair of cross-trainers, threw the old shoes away on the spot, and walked about a mile around the mall, and damned if it didn't start hurting again! I'll be calling a podiatrist tomorrow. It sounds like Morton's neuroma. I can't imagine what I'll look like if I lose all the weight without walking for exercise!!

I need a fill!!

2007-04-19T21:14:00.000-05:00

I've been struggling really hard all week, and have put 2 lbs back on! I don't see the doctor again until Tuesday, which is actually a week earlier than it was supposed to be because he has to go out of town. I'll be shocked if I lose anything this weekend. I'm hungry all the time, and my food choices are like totally BAD (mini-eclairs anyone?). I can eat just about anything I want, and am probably eating a cup at a time, and grazing all day. *sigh*

Still, I'm leery about getting the fill, based on it went the first time, and this fill will probably take me up to 1cc. I can't imagine him giving me only .25cc and I already have .5cc in there.

Because I'm hungry, I've been eating fast, so I've had a couple of PBs this week, but nothing like I've had in the past, thank God! Today I just flat out wasn't paying attention and ate too much and oops, there it went. I'm still not really getting that "full" signal...hopefully the fill will fix that.

Eh, life with the band...not quite what I expected it to be!

8 weeks post-op

2007-04-15T18:40:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 195.8
Total lost: 38.7

OK, so since Monday, I hadn't had a PB until Friday night, and it's been bad since then. I'm going full fluids tonight to end it (which I should have done yesterday). Nice loss this week though, 3.2 lbs.

I've started walking down to the dock, and walking back up, instead of taking the golf cart. For those of you who haven't seen it, we live on a hill that has probably a 10% grade. For someone with bad knees, it's a nightmare, and for most people, a few trips up and down it will cause some tightening in the back of the legs, and perhaps muscle-aches. It's not a lot of exercise, but it's a start.

Size 18 slacks no longer fit me at all, but most of my 16s are fairly snug. I have got to get rid of this belly, which seems to be the majority of the "snug" problem. They go over my thighs, they fit my butt, but come to zip them and it's no go. I do think it's time to get going on the exercise.

When I have the PBs under control, I'm happy and excited about being banded. My daughter asked me last night if knowing what I know, would I do it again. I had to think about it for a minute, but ultimately, the answer is yes. I'm thrilled with how quickly the weight is coming off, and knowing that before Christmas (sooner?), I'll be completely done, and in the meantime, I won't look horrible wearing shorts and the skimpy little tops I love wearing so much during the summer. ;)

Oops!

2007-04-11T18:41:00.000-05:00

I should have updated this after my doctor's appointment and didn't. I'm sorry for worrying you guys!

The doctor basically said that he believes it's behavioral, that I haven't hurt my band (he said it would take longer than 2 months of the off/on PBing to cause it to slip), and that he won't give me anymore fills until it's under control.

And of course, I haven't PB'd since I made the appointment. Sheesh!! I've gotten close, but have been able to walk it off each time.

Interestingly, he said that I have a tight band. I suspect (and these are just my own thoughts, and I'm too afraid to ask him) that I was probably borderline on whether to have the regular band or the larger, VG band, and he chose the smaller one. It would explain why a 1cc fill would have caused me so much trouble. Maybe on the next visit, I'll ask him. I've actually thought this for about a month now.

I have a visit in 3 weeks to see how I'm doing. He was very pleased that I had lost 11 lbs (by his scale) since my visit on March 20th, and said he didn't think I really needed a fill, because I'm still losing so well. He also told me to eat a snack in between meals to help with the hunger. So now I get 3 meals and 2 snacks a day...bet THAT slows down my weight loss....lol!

Anyway, I was able to actually eat a piece of thin crust pizza last night, which was a real treat. :)

So, that's where we are. Thanks for caring!!

Appointment made

2007-04-09T10:42:00.000-05:00

I'll be seeing Dr. B tomorrow at 11 a.m.

But of course, after getting myself upset again about all this, I managed to eat and keep down last night's dinner of pork loin, asparagus and mashed potatoes.

I am absolutely positive that these PBs are caused by my own behaviors, and the fact that if I really focus on my meals, I can keep the food down, just confirms it.

I'll feel better though if he can assure me that I've not hurt my band!

And I really, really want to thank all of you who are coming by here and reading. It means a lot!

7 weeks post-op

2007-04-08T06:59:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 199.0
Total lost: 35.5

Well, I'm finally under 200, but believe it or not, I'm not happy about it. After my last post about the PBs stopping, by the next night, they were back in full force and haven't stopped yet. With each day that passes, I'm growing more concerned that my band has slipped. I'm calling my doctor tomorrow.

I'm positive that these PBs are behavioral - that I'm eating too fast and not chewing well enough, although God knows, I try. Last night, it was so bad that I couldn't even hold a glass of milk down, although I'm doing ok with coffee today. The thing I am noticing though, is that it now seems to be primarily happening at night, so I'm going to try making my lunch my heavier meal and keeping dinner light, and primarily mushies.

I'm also terrified that I'm headed for malnutrition if I don't get this under control pretty soon. I know when I call my doctor, he's going to want to unfill me, and I'm already starving between meals!

There are truly days when I wish I hadn't done this :(

Weehaww!!

2007-04-04T19:36:00.000-05:00

On the way to work: One Myoplex protein shake.

Breakfast: Eggbeaters, one small strip of bacon, one-half of a "Health Nut" english muffin (very high grained).

Snack: 5 cashews.

Lunch: Tomato Soup at Hand, 4 crackers.

Snack: Oops, one-half of a chocolate chip cookie during an office supply company's presentation...everyone else was eating.

Dinner: More of the grilled chicken and mashed potatoes that I ordered at Chili's on Saturday! That was three meals I made out of that child's portion, and still hadn't gotten but halfway through it! I finally fed the rest to the dog, figuring it had been reheated enough.

And best of all...not one PB!! Woohooo!! This was the most food I've eaten in many days. I bet I'm up a pound tomorrow. For the first time, I wouldn't mind.

The most critical thing has been to get the PBs stopped. If I can keep this up for a few days, then I can get back on track. But I've been so very low in nutrition the past few days and it's got me terrified. I lost quite a bit of hair this morning, so I'm not worried about calories at this point.

And actually, with so much protein (and really, not that bad on calories), I may drop a couple of pounds. My body likes me doing a high calorie day a couple of times a week and rewards me appropriately. We'll just have to see :)

But NO PBs!!!!!!!!!!

6 weeks post-op

2007-04-01T20:10:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 201.2
Total lost: 33.3

Still PBing, but not as often. I'm finally learning to take much smaller bites, to put my fork down between bites. Now the thing that I need to work on is knowing when to stop...and I'm even getting better about that over the past couple of days. I'm finally learning to recognize that STOP point before it's too late.

At the moment, I'm wearing some of the shorts that I was wearing last summer, before the weight started piling back on! That's very exciting for me. I spent today cleaning out my closet, and while I didn't get rid of any clothes (except 2 pairs of pants), I pulled all of my clothes out and washed them, and I'm looking forward to getting back into some of them.

I've discovered that I can eat pasta, and best of all, I can eat bread (toasted). I just have to be smart about both of them...very very small bites, and chew very well before swallowing. I can eat Texas toast, but I cut the slice in half, so that I'm eating only the top 1/8" and that's good enough for me.

I'm only 1.3 lbs away from being under 200 again....Woohooo!!

Good news, bad news - 5 wks post-op

2007-03-24T13:05:00.000-05:00

Start weight: 234.5
Current weight: 205.0
Total lost: 29.5

Good news: I've lost 2.7 lbs (so far) this week.
Bad news: I haven't had a lot to eat.

I saw my doctor on Tuesday the 20th and he was very pleased with my progress. He asked if I had had a fill yet, so I told him about the fill/unfill fiasco. He decided to go ahead and give me a .5cc fill. I ate fine the rest of Tuesday and Wednesday, but on Thursday the problems started. I ate 1/2 of a scrambled egg, 1 slice of crispy bacon, and 1/2 of a slice of wheat toast with jelly. I felt like I was in heaven! I had no problems eating any of that. But lunch Thursday came back up. Dinner came back up. I kept yesterday's oatmeal down, but lunch and dinner came back up, and so did this morning's breakfast. I've decided to go on mushies for the rest of the weekend.

I think I ate too much at lunch Thursday, and that PB lead to some swelling, and I haven't given my body a chance to rest since then. Hopefully, doing mushies will get things under control. I can't believe a little .5 cc fill could make me this tight.

The 2.7 lbs I've lost this week has been entirely lost since Thursday :(

4 weeks post-op

2007-03-18T19:46:00.000-05:00

Start Weight: 234.5 lbs.
Current Weight: 207.8 lbs.
Total Lost: 26.7 lbs.

Well, it looks like I've settled down to 1-2 lbs. per week. I lost 2.2 lbs. this week. I can really tell that I don't have much restriction, but if I'm losing 2 lbs. per week, I guess I'm doing ok. I definitely feel more "open" since my fill/unfill a few days ago. I haven't PB'd once, although I came close a couple of times. And the other night, I finally felt full, from eating. That hasn't happened in awhile and I had eaten about 3/4-1 cup of food...far more than I should be eating.

I think if I continue ok on the PBs, I'll make an appointment for 2 weeks, and ask for a small fill, like maybe .5cc.

I'm happy with what I've lost, but I really would like to drop a little bit faster, and I think a small fill will do the trick.

Oh, and I want to apologize to the friends and family who visit here for some of the technical aspect of being a lapband patient, but a lot of people visit from a lapband forums and we're sharing information ;)

For those who have asked, here's updated pics, taken on 3/17.

First fill misery

2007-03-15T18:01:00.000-05:00

Since I've been getting ravenously hungry every two hours, I was really looking forward to my first fill today.

I went in and the fill nurse and I talked for quite awhile, and she was concerned with the number of times that I've PB'd and vomited in the past week. I explained to her that I'm starving when it's time to eat and that I keep having to fight the urge to eat quickly and with too large of a bite. She told me that she really didn't think I should have a fill yet, but she'd go ahead and give me one, if I promised to work on those issues. I promised, and she whipped out the hypodermic and gave me a 1.2cc fill.

I went to take my drink of water and it was quickly apparent that I was too tight. We went back to the room where she proceeded to poke me a second time, and removed .3cc.

Back to the water fountain and this time when I took a drink, I felt like I was in huge trouble. The nurse gave me the option of having the fill removed, or going over to the surgery center and having an x-ray because she was beginning to feel like I had slipped, with all the PBs and vomiting.

They got me into the xray room and gave me barium, and said the band was fine - no slippage (hey, some good news), but the nurse once again came with her handy dandy hypo and after poking me for the third time, took out the rest of my fill.

She said that until I learn to get PBs and vomiting under control - no fills for me, but that I can try again in two weeks, if I have the issues under control.

She did say a couple of things today that surprised me, and I'm posting them here to remind myself later. She said that at this point, I shouldn't worry about getting in enough calories (which was a concern), and that at no point did I need to worry about getting in 60g. of protein, because the only people who need that much protein were athletes! She said that she knew that went against popular belief, but that's been her experience. She said just to get in what I could, and was pleased that I am drinking a Myocel shake daily (17g. of protein) in addition to whatever foods I'm eating.

So, here I am, back at the .5cc my band was filled with at the time of surgery, and still hungry. Although, I did keep my tuna salad lunch down, and have drank almost a whole bottle of water, which is a huge improvement over most days, and I didn't come through the front door prepared to eat whichever animal first presented itself...lol...but I am starting to feel hungry now. Guess it's time to make dinner.

3 weeks post op

2007-03-10T09:25:00.000-06:00

Starting weight: 234.5
Current weight: 210.0
Total lost: 24.5

I was going to post last weekend, but the house next door burned to the ground and our house was affected, so I wasn't much up to it (for more detail on that, see Tales from Tawakoni).

I'm still losing at a fairly good rate. I still have PBs from time to time, but I've discovered they're mostly my fault - eating too fast is probably the #1 cause, followed by not chewing well enough. I had one last night trying to eat an egg roll (insides, not the wrapper) and orange chicken. After I thought about it, I took much smaller bites, and chewed chewed chewed and everything was fine.

For the most part, I'm still on mushies, but occasionally, as noted above, I do throw some real food, just trying to find out what I can and cannot eat. In the morning, I'm eating a full package of Instant Oatmeal. I'm drinking full cans of Soup at Hand. I can eat a full package of chicken salad and stonewheat crackers with no trouble at all. I guess I'm eating about 1/2 cup of food at a sitting...every two hours. At that 2nd hour point, I'm simply ravenous and my stomach is growling loudly.

I'm currently scheduled for my first fill on 3/15, although I can't decide if I really need a fill, or if this is normal. I have requested guidance from the wonderful experts on LapbandTalk. If you're considering lapband surgery, that is an incredible resource.

My energy level is finally coming back up, 99% of the pain from the incisions is gone, and what little I have is only annoying, not excruciating. I'm hoping to start walking this week, since the weather is nice, and there's just no excuses anymore NOT to! ;)

I've lost a full size in my pants and am wearing some of the stuff that I had bought last summer. Those clothes were bought as I was gaining weight, so there's no real joy in wearing them yet, but it does feel good to know I'm down nearly 25 lbs! I can see it in my face, and my body is changing rapidly (yeah, I still think I'm in for a tummy tuck when this is over...we'll see). No hair loss yet, in fact, oddly, I'm losing less than I was before the surgery.

HOWEVER....Last night, I was genuinely unhappy, and truly regretting that I had had the surgery done. By taking small bites and chew chew chewing, my dinner was stone cold by the time I got done eating. I ranted and raved around here for a few minutes, and nothing Scott said made me feel better. The weight I've lost already didn't make me feel better. I was just miserable and depressed.

I imagine that was only the first of such tantrums ahead of me. But the bottom line is that I AM almost 25 lbs down, which is almost 1/4th of what I need to lose. I know and acknowledge that the weight loss will eventually slow down to 1-2 lbs a week, but I'm 25% of the way to my goal.

I told Scott the other night that if something happens where they have to operate on me again, like my port flipping, or erosion, or whatever, I'm not having the band placed again. He said I was nuts, having gone through the past year of dieting, counseling, testing, etc., just to undo it. He's probably right, and once I get through the head adjustment of having the band, I'll probably be fine.

I hope.

11 days post op

2007-02-25T07:57:00.000-06:00

Starting weight: 234.5
Current weight: 217.2
Total lost: 17.3 lbs.

OK, I promised I'd be honest on this thing, so here goes.

Last Sunday, I ordered stromboli for Scott and Shannon, and I just wanted one little bite, which I took. About 5 minutes later, my world fell apart! I started vomiting, and was in severe pain. This continued for the next 12 hours. I either didn't chew it well enough, or it was the bread, but in any event, that will never happen again! I had NO business trying it anyway, since I was only 4 days post op. For 3 days after that, I could only get fluids down. The doctor's office said I probably had some swelling.

But here, a week later, I'm now able to eat some soft foods - creamy soups, a scrambled egg, mashed potatoes. It's a week early to be eating some of this stuff, but now that all the swelling is gone, I don't seem to have a lot of restriction in the band, and my first fill isn't until March 15, so I get HUNGRY.

I had originally planned to go back to work this past Thursday, but ended up calling the office and asking for the rest of the week, so I'll return tomorrow. I'm a little nervous about that, considering that I run from one end of the office to the other all day long, but hopefully, it'll be ok.

I'm still having a little pain at the port site, but all of the incisions have healed, and all the steri-strips are gone. The best part, of course, is being 17.3 lbs lighter!

I may post some pictures later today.

Progress

2007-02-18T14:52:00.000-06:00

Weight: 223.8 lbs.
Total since pre-op diet: 10.7 lbs.
Total since surgery: 5.2 lbs.

I finally got out of the house yesterday, and went to Walmart. That was definitely a chore! I also walked down to the beach today, but Scott had to bring me back up in the golf cart.

I'm trying to stay compliant with my liquid diet, but I started having hunger pains today. This is NOT good! My first fill won't be until 3/20, and I won't start full liquids for another 8 days, and mushy food for another 2 wks after that.

I may have to call and see if I can have an early fill.

Two days post surgery

2007-02-16T11:57:00.000-06:00

OK...I suppose if I were younger, this might have been a lot easier, but as of today, I'm getting around quite a bit better. Thank God for Lortab! It tastes nasty in its liquid form, but I can live with that. The first two days were pretty brutal though.

I've lost 3.5 lbs since going into surgery Wednesday morning, so my stats look like this: 234.5/225.5/140 (that's prior weight/current weight/goal weight).

The first layer of bandaids came off last night, and the incisions are looking pretty good. Looks like the scarring will be minimal.

I can get all my maintenance pills down without crushing or cutting, which was a concern. So far, my biggest concern is remembering to "eat"! I have to have 3 protein shakes a day AND 3 liquids from a short list. I guess I'm going to have to schedule times to eat and make sure I get them all in, which will be easier when I'm not sleeping every few hours.

So far, I'm pleased! :)

3 days till lapband!

2007-02-11T21:25:00.000-06:00

OK, I had Scott take my before pictures tonight. I've lost 7 lbs since I started my semi-liquid diet on Wednesday, January 31, so I'm down to 227.4.

I'm getting a little nervous, but I'm sure everything will be just fine! *gulp*

Surgery is scheduled!

2007-02-03T23:08:00.000-06:00

Well, after almost a year of jumping through hoops, my lapband surgery is scheduled for Valentine's Day. The timing isn't great, but I'll never forget my banding date :)

It also gives me a week off work, and I'll be heading back up to Ohio again during that week to celebrate my daughter's 25th birthday.

I'm on a pre-operative diet, and it's just killing me. There's no way I can stick to it. I have a breakfast of cereal or oatmeal, along with toast or fruit, a protein shake for lunch, and then a dinner consisting of a lean meat and a vegetable, and then another protein shake. Unfortunately, by the time dinner rolls around, I'm just starving and eat more than I should. This is less food than I'd be eating after I get banded! I don't know how they expect me to do this. :(

My starting weight on the pre-operative diet was 234.5. I'm loathe to admit that publicly, but if I'm going to share my journey through lapband, then I need to be honest.

Wish me luck!

And life goes on...

2006-10-09T18:34:00.000-05:00

Well, after almost a year on Nutrisystem and almost a year off NS, I'm back to my starting weight. *sigh*

However, I having been going through all the pre-operative stuff for lapband surgery. During the mandatory heart stress test, they found something they didn't like, and I consequently ended up having a heart cath done, which showed the beginning of heart disease. "Lose weight", my cardiologist said. DUH!

I met with the nutritionist today who told me what life will be like after lapband. No carbinated drinks, no fat, no sugar. She commented, "You'll never be able to drink 8 ounces of anything again", which kinda stunned me. This is for real, and it's for life.

But I'm really frigging tired of being fat.

Thursday I have a 2 hour psych evaluation, to make sure I'll stay with this. It makes me want to study up :)

I kid you not...

2006-06-22T12:46:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is national "Take Your Dog to Work Day".

Could you imagine?

I work in a firm on the 39th through 43rd floors of a building - I could only think it would be mass hysteria!

But while I poo-poo *snicker* the idea with the rest of the office cronies...

I kinda wish I could bring my puppy to work ;)

Boy, it's been a long time!

2006-05-26T21:19:00.000-05:00

I didn't realize how long it had been since I last posted on this blog...too long, I'm afraid. So, it's update time :)

I've gained back 30 of the 50 lbs I lost last year, and I'm now planning on having lap band surgery. I have to have 6 months of doctor supervised diet, and then a bunch of testing, so this isn't an immediate plan. I'm right on the edge of "acceptable" under the surgery guidelines, so it'll be tricky to show that I've spent 6 months actively dieting, without slipping under the acceptable range.

In the meantime, I'm miserable again...I have to go buy clothes one size larger. It won't be many, believe me, because I do not intend to keep climbing beyond that "acceptable" range.

It's starting to get hot...mid to high 90s, and we discovered our air conditioner needs to be replaced. We've bought a window unit for now, and it's actually keeping up with the heat pretty well.

My garden is finally starting to bloom. One of my oriental lilies has bloomed, and the stargazer lilies aren't far behind...woohoo! The lamb's ear is taking over the area I wanted it to. My gardenia plant (a housewarming present) has blooms on it all the time and smells so wonderful when you walk past it. The caladiums are likewise taking over their designated area. Several people have told us that our yard looks so much better than it did when the previous owners had it. *beam*

I'm on vacation for the next 10 days, which just thrills me. I'm so ready for it. As much as I love Kristi and Kathryn, going up there last October to help Kristi deliver Kathryn was not a vacation. Several people have asked me if I'm going anywhere, and my answer is always the same - I live on a lake, why go anywhere else? I may sneak off to a casino one day though ;)

So yeah, I'm still alive. There's been a lot going on the past couple of weeks, but not something that I want to put out here. (Mom, Dad, Kathy - I'll compose an email this weekend to fill you in.)

I'll try to do better about keeping this blog up. Tawakoni Tales is "our" blog, and I try to keep my personal life off it, since it's read by a lot of people at Scott's work. So this remains my space...although I'm seriously considering a move to WordPress. Time will tell.

Ciao!

Switching Diets

2006-03-23T22:28:00.000-06:00

Having tried, and failed, to get back on track with Nutrisystem, I have given up on it.

I will be embarking on the 6 Week Makeover starting this coming Sunday. It is based very much on the same principles as NS, but you learn to use regular foods in a combination meant to jumpstart your metabolism. I had been down to 176 on NS by October of last year, and have slowly worked my way back up to 194.1 (today). I'm NOT happy about this at all.

I still have a ton of NS dinners which I will probably use to supplement this plan, or will throw on ebay to recoup some of my money.

So, wish me luck.

Blogshares NT: !blogshares

2006-03-13T14:11:00.000-06:00

To satisfy the desires of one Rantzalot, I am hereby permanently linking to you ;)

Blogshares NT: !blogshares

Missin my baby

2006-03-12T19:14:00.000-06:00

Scott is on call this week, and because we live so far out in the country, and he needs to be close 24/7, he is staying in a hotel in Plano for the week. I spent Friday night with him, and then holed up with my laundry (gag...7 loads) and my soaps, and have caught up about a months' worth (I was like 6 or 7 weeks behind...thank God for TIVOs).

But it seems really strange to be without him right now. This time period is an anniversary of sorts...our first online conversation occurred 3/3, our first meeting was 3/5, we first slept together 3/8 (shut up, all you people who just gasped), and on his birthday, 3/17, he asked me to move in with him - although I hadn't been back to my apartment other than to change clothes since the 8th ;)

Since that time period, the only times that we've been apart was when I've gone to my daughter's in Ohio (for a maximum of 5 days) a couple of times.

So this feels really bizarre...specially since it's freaking hot in the house (84 as I write at 7:19p). I really should pack up and go to my man and his air-conditioned room at the hotel....hmmm, do I feel like driving for an hour?

Wow!

2006-02-22T17:21:00.000-06:00

My blog is worth $4,516.32.
How much is your blog worth?

On a more serious note...

2006-02-22T15:52:00.000-06:00

I have arthritis in both knees. As we know, I'm far too young to have such an affliction! So, last year, I spoke with my orthopedist to see what the current treatments were and he told me about Synvisc.

Synvisc is a synthetic fluid which is injected and mimics the actual fluid in the knee. Administration is a series of three injections into the knee, one injection per week for three weeks.

As you might imagine, this is not a fun procedure. However, I have to admit that the injections actually do work. The really down side is that the treatment only lasts for six months, so you're looking at two series of injections per year. As a relatively new process, some insurance companies are a little reluctant to pay for it, but so far, mine has.

So, if you're afflicted with arthritis in the knees, you might want to look into this.

Losing weight also helps...and I'm back down another 2 lbs! :)

Whew!

2006-02-17T12:39:00.000-06:00

I totally worry about this!

This was fun

2006-02-15T08:55:00.000-06:00

I think it would have been more satisfying if the test told you which questions you missed. I'm surprised that I missed any of them...let's not tell my bosses ;)

Senior Editor
You scored 81 out of a possible 100 (minimum of -20).

If an error gets by you, it has to be pretty darn sneaky. If your career path has nothing to do with English, there's a good chance you've got a better grasp on this language than most of your coworkers ever will.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 64% on corrections

Link: The Proofreading Test written by standingwave on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Weekend Update

2006-02-05T17:10:00.000-06:00

Scott's mom is still in the hospital and not doing terribly well. She told the doctors and nurses today that she wants DNRs put in place (Do Not Resusitate), and she will have an outpatient DNR as well...meaning if she has another heart attack, all the paramedics will be able to do is provide her with comfort care - meds to ease the pain, and that's it.

I took Shannon to see her grandmother today and it took her 10 minutes to even realize Shannon was standing there - and of course, all this DNR talk occurred right in front of Shannon. I felt so bad for her...she was stricken, when she realized her grandma is giving up.

Scott's taking it pretty hard too, which is to be expected. His mom made sure she told me again what she wanted done, because she knows Scott won't be in good shape when it happens, and she wants me to make sure it's done. *sigh*

Scott and a friend who has been staying with us the past couple of weeks spent all weekend getting the electrical done on the boathouse and on the dock...it looks so much better and infinitely safer! It was literally a fire waiting to happen before.

I had to take Jonah to the vet yesterday to get his booster injections and on heartworm provention. He also had an ear infection that was bothering him pretty badly for the past week. I thought it was mites and felt really bad that I didn't get him to the vet sooner!

Guess that's it for now!

Good news, bad news

2006-02-03T10:25:00.000-06:00

Good news: I'm down 4.7 pounds since Monday. Bad news: I'm not doing it 100%.

Good news: It's raining. Bad news: It's raining.

Scott's been catching catfish all week, and last night, I got to reel one in..it was only about 3-4 lbs, but it was fun nonetheless. I have officially become a fishing widow, and he lives and breathes barometric pressure changes, weather changes, and for the first time in my life, I have a weather station in my home. Fortunately, it's an attractive little contraption :)

Scott's mom is in the hospital again. She had another heart attack on Wednesday night. It wasn't a severe one (as heart attacks go); however, with all of her allergies to medications, and her kidneys functioning at 20% of normal, they can't treat her as aggressively as they would an otherwise healthy person. So they're going to try and treat her with aspirin and other medications they know she isn't allergic to, before they decide to do a heart catheter.

I don't know how I've gotten ANYTHING done this week because I've been hooked reading Dooce.com. Heather, if you ever see this, I hold you personally responsible for my dishes not being done!! Ever tried reading FIVE years of someone's blog? Someone who posts pretty religiously? It takes a lot of time, even if you read fast like I do. Then there's the pictures...over 500 of them at this point in time. Now I know why her site is referred to as the "venerable Dooce.com"! It's certainly a site to aspire to.

Right decision :)

2006-01-31T12:50:00.000-06:00

So, after making the decision to return to Nutrisystem, I chose Monday, January 30, as my "restart" date.

When I woke up yesterday, I hit the scale and was staggered to see 189.3! YIKES!!

I hit the scale this morning and, drum-roll please...I'm down to 187.3...TWO whole pounds since yesterday.

It's really too bad that my mind hates dieting, because my body sure loves it!

Food Decision Made

2006-01-29T13:41:00.000-06:00

Back here, I was trying to decide whether to stay on Nutrisystem (or go back to, in reality)or go/stay off, because we have undertaken a contract on a meat/freezer package which costs the $5 more per month than NS.

After giving it a great deal of thought (and gaining back 8 pounds!), we've decided to do both. This means that I will be cooking him meals, instead of him eating TV dinners *groan* . He'd had enough of them, and really, I can't blame him, because that's how I've felt about NS. But, my weight is creeping up again, and I hadn't lost all I wanted to in the first place, so it makes more sense to stick with it, or the past year of expense and the agony of dieting will have been for nothing, and I just can't have that.

I have to say though, that after a year, more or less, of eating boxed foods, it is very odd to look into a 19.2 cubic foot freezer (it's bigger than my refrigerator!) and see a mass of frozen red meat. Anticipating lots of company and cookouts, we stocked up on hamburger and a few steaks. I don't think I've seen raw red meat more than twice in the past 12 months...I'm suddenly feeling really happy about my decision to return to boxed food.

I must be doing something wrong

2006-01-28T11:58:00.000-06:00

I've been reading a new-to-me blog called "Dooce.com" written by a gal named Heather. As I always do when finding a new blog, I read from the earliest post forward. Heather mentions in her blog, as others have in their blogs, that she receives hate mail.

Since I don't receive hate mail, I must be doing something wrong. Perhaps I don't slam people, religion, cities, whatever, often enough. Maybe my life is too idyllic and without angst. Possibly, I don't cuss enough (at least on here - offline, I swear like a sailor!). Maybe I'm just boring (which is probably true).

Of course, the highest number of readers this blog has ever received in one day was like 55, and since I assume most of those are friends and family, they'd have no reason to send me hate mail anyway.

So, what do I need to do around here to get more attention and maybe even some hate mail?

Decisions, decisions

2006-01-23T12:32:00.000-06:00

I thought I was ready to quit Nutrisystems. Judging by my weight gain in the past couple of weeks...maybe not.

That $260 a month or so was part of the equation when my husband decided he wanted to buy into one of those meat/freezer packages for $265 a month. We figured if I wasn't going to do Nutrisystem, we would just transfer the funds from that to the meat package.

I don't know yet if we can afford both - well, we could, I just would have to make it a financial priority and juggle the books.

As long as I'm making even a half-hearted attempt to stay on NS, my weight stays the same, but I gained two pounds this weekend! Without the structure of NS, and the freedom to eat as I choose, I lose control. :(

I still need to lose 45 lbs...apparently, I can't do it on my own yet.

What to do???

Somehow, I'm not surprised

2006-01-18T12:09:00.000-06:00

what decade does your personality live in?

quiz brought to you by lady interference, ltd

Wherefore art thou??

2006-01-09T14:38:00.000-06:00

If you've been on the internet for any length of time, I'm sure that you've experienced "Missing Friend Syndrome".

This is where you've known someone online for a couple of years and yes, consider them a friend, but for whatever reason, never actually reached out and called them on the phone, and then suddenly, they are gone.

I've had this happen a few times. In one case, the person actually died, and it was devastating to everyone she had "known" online, as well as offline.

When it happens, it's a little disturbing to me...kind of like reading a book and being at a really good part...and then you lose the book.

Since I've started blogging, I've gotten involved in a few blogs. One that I had been reading, and commented in a few times, was called "The Daily WTF" over on dairyland, but which was not thedailywtf.com. Anyway, Rachelle (the blogger) had a potty mouth, and she was FUNNY.

Because of all that we've been going through, I hadn't caught up on my blog circle for awhile and decided to go see what Rachelle was up and DAMN IT...she's gone! Poof! Not just "hasn't posted in months", but the only entry on her site is "I'm outtie" - so it was an intentional thing.

It just makes me crazy when someone disappears like that :/

Weekend of January 7-8, 2006

2006-01-09T08:29:00.000-06:00

Guests on Saturday:
Sam, Kaye and 3 kids
Keith M.
Shannon
Jennifer, LaRon and Alyssa

As noted, we had several guests this weekend and we had a great time! Sam is Scott's boss and Keith is a friend of his from work. Everyone went fishing and several catfish were caught.

I spent most of the weekend trying to repair my computer, which seemed to get only worse. Looking at a rebuild next weekend...yuck!!

Sunday was spent cleaning the yards...the neighborhood dogs love to get hold of our trash, and we're still trying to get rid of the trash that the seller left us.

We met a few more of our neighbors. It's encouraging that everyone is making an effort to stop by and meet us! Of course, it's such a small community that I'm sure they want to meet us and make certain we're not drug dealers or whatever.

On the schedule for this week: Getting Shannon's room painted.

Jonah and the Lake

2006-01-02T08:38:00.000-06:00

Jonah loves living out here at the Lake. The first time he was allowed down on the beach, he headed straight for the water...and has every time since then!

Here are some other pictures of him enjoying his new life!

Life goes on

2005-12-30T10:23:00.000-06:00

Ziggy's death kind of overshadowed everything else that has happened since the 23rd, but I don't want to let Christmas completely slide by.

As previously mentioned, my mom was here from California, and my daughter and her family were here from Ohio.

We were completely out of the old house by the 22nd, but the new house was a mess. I had to be at work every day, so my mom and daughter did the most wonderful thing for me and cleaned where possible, and tried to organize.

We ended up having a fairly quiet Christmas Eve, as Kristi and her family went down to the lake to stay with my ex-in-laws, so Christmas Eve was just me, Scott and my mom.

Christmas morning, we drove out to Scott's mom and delivered her present, and then drove on down to the lake, where we stayed for about 4 hours - missing out on breakfast AND dinner - kinda sucked, and then we had to drive home to meet Scott's step-son Travis and his family. The next morning, we picked Shannon up and then threw an impromptu BBQ with Scott's kids and my daughter and her family...it was a lot of fun. The Texas weather was being kind and we enjoyed 70 degree temps for our first official BBQ at our lake house :)

Kristi and her family left our house Monday night, and left Dallas Tuesday morning. My mom left Wednesday morning...ugh, had to leave the house at 5 am to get her to the airport - and at that, I had underestimated how long it would take and she almost missed her flight.

I loved having them all with me for the first time in many years!

Scott started our remodelling with our bedroom/office. He painted the office, all the trim in both rooms, laid carpet in both rooms and knocked out the wall between them (although not in that order). It took him longer than he thought, but it's 99% done right now and the other 1% will have to wait for our checking account to magically refill itself. It looks great, and the bedroom is much larger and brighter. We should be able to put our office together this weekend.

The livingroom is completely devoid of Christmas now, and is just waiting for the computer stuff to be moved to the office, then we can start deciding picture placement, etc.

After that, we will be painting Shannon's bedroom (our guest room) which is currently Pepto-pink, lavendar and candy apple green (arrrggghhhh!) and which will be painted a color called "Cool Water", which is a very slightly green-tinted blue.

Of note is the fact that Katie, our other Quaker Parrot, seems to realize that Ziggy is gone, and is taking the opportunity to start showing off her personality. She had learned many of his phrases, so it's a little eerie hearing them from her, but she's also bringing out sounds of her own and seems hungry to learn more. Maybe it took the "top dog" being gone for her to come out of her shell.

Well, I hope some of this made sense - I'm sicker than a dog and still at work, so I'm a little braindead. More later!

Rest in Peace, my darling Ziggy

2005-12-28T20:58:00.000-06:00

This morning, around 8:00 a.m., my darling Ziggy passed away.

We didn't even realize something was wrong until last night, when he started shivering and wanted to be cuddled. By then, it was too late. I did get to hold him for a couple of hours last night, as he seemed to seek me out again and again. I'd like to think that he knew he was going and wanted to spend his remaining time with me.

I've cried all day, mourning the loss of that little bird who had such a huge impact on our family in the year that we've had him. No more Ziggy singing karaoke and opera, or barking at the dog, or meowing at the cat. No more "Mommy!!" shrieked at the top of his lungs. No more Ziggy begging for pizza, bread, or oyster crackers. No more preening my hair, no more nibbling my ear, or chasing my bare feet.

He will be buried at the top of the hill behind our house, where hopefully, he won't be disturbed for many years to come.

I love you Zigman...and miss you terribly! It's already too quiet without you.

Ziggy - Died 12/28/05

Killing time and an update

2005-12-23T13:06:00.000-06:00

Since I'm stuck at work for another hour or so and could be doing real work, but not under any pressure to do so, I figured I'd take some time to update my blog.

I believe I last left off with the fact that we were supposed to move into our house last Saturday, the 17th and, of course, since nothing else has gone smoothly with this deal, I have a story to tell you about it.

We rented our truck on Friday evening, and Scott and his friend, John, started loading it. Scott and I drove out to the house at 4:00 p.m. to do our walk-through, since the seller had already told us he wouldn't be out at 8:00 a.m., like he was supposed to be.

We get out there and...the power is off. It's a little hard to do a proper walk-through with no power, but we did the best we could...HA!

There was still a little furniture in every room. It was apparent that they hadn't cleaned the house at all. The boat house was still filled to the brim with the seller's crap. One of the ceramic light covers on the patio was broken and pieces on the ground. Their teenage daughter wrote on the walls of her bedroom in black magic marker "Tiffany loves you - 11/11/05"....one week before we closed on the house. It was also obvious that the seller had allowed his dogs to hang out in the two carpeted bedrooms - where they apparently relieved themselves. Despite all of this, the seller assured us that they would be completely out that night, and would leave the key for us under a brick by the porch.

Disappointed once again, and furious that we were unable to get into the house and were paying rent on the truck for a second day, we went home, after stopping first at Home Depot and picking out new carpet for the bedrooms, and paint for the walls of the room that will become our office - which was a hideous dark blue.

Sunday morning, we rolled out of the house at the crack of dawn and headed to our new home. Bear in mind that it is a 46 mile drive one way. We arrive at the house and discover that the seller didn't leave the key - but that's ok, the front door was unlocked.

We walk in the house and...the furniture is still there. The house is filthy and I mean that truly. They hadn't washed the tub, hadn't swept, hadn't washed windows...it was truly dirty. Seller shows up a few minutes later and Scott says "What were you going to do with this furniture? Do you need a hand getting it out of here?" And the seller says, "I wasn't planning on doing anything with it...I was just going to leave it." WTF? At that point, he started understanding how pissed off we were and helped Scott get it out of the house and then, the only decent thing the guy has done throughout this ordeal, he and his brother in law helped Scott unload the truck...good thing, because our driveway is a 20% grade and there is no way we would have gotten it done by ourselves.

Today is Friday, and we finally got the last load of little crap over to the new house. The old house is as spotless as I can make it. My mother and my daughter have been cleaning the new house while I work, and trying to organize it as best they can. I'm hoping to get it finished up over the next few days, but I'm utterly and totally exhausted.

All I can say is that I'm getting far too old for this crap and if we ever move again, Scott better plan on getting movers and a cleaning crew.

OK, I'm out of here...Merry Christmas everyone!!

It's starting to look a lot like Christmas!

2005-12-14T19:39:00.000-06:00

Last week, our entire town lost its power - on the coldest day we've had this year. The temperature outside was 16, but I have no idea how cold it got in the house. The birds became lethargic from the cold, so we lit a fire in the fireplace we hadn't used in the two and a half years we lived here, and put the bird cages in a semi-circle around the fire to warm them up. Oh, we're down to four birds - we re-homed Lucy two weeks ago. We just couldn't take her screeching anymore - and the other 4 were starting to imitate her! At 5:30 in the morning, that just wasn't cool.

We're supposed to (finally!!) move into our house Saturday morning - and our weather forecast is calling for snow. Somehow, that makes sense, after all we've been through to get the house.

My daughter and her family will arrive here tomorrow from Ohio. They'll be staying for two weeks, but I don't know how much I'll actually see of them. I know they have plans to visit all their friends and other family members, but I know I'll at least see them here and there.

My mom will arrive from California on the 21st...I just hope we have the house set up by then!

My livingroom is filled with boxes and Christmas presents - but no tree yet. Doesn't make sense to buy one when you're about to move :)

I've been letting this blog slide while we've been busy packing, but I'll try to get better about it after the first of the year. If I don't post before then - have a Merry Christmas!

Tis the Season!

2005-11-29T20:19:00.000-06:00

I started listening to Manheim Steamroller last night - always my indicator that the Christmas spirit is upon me :)

Since the stress of the house purchase has passed, and Scott assures me that he'll handle the move and that we will have a Christmas tree for our first Christmas in our new home, I decided to jump back on the Nutrisystem band wagon starting yesterday. I've had two 100% days in a row, and was down 1.4 lbs this morning...woohoo!

Our dog, Jonah, has been with us 31 days now, and he's gained 10 lbs! He was thin when we got him and needed filling out, so this is a good thing. He's such a good dog, although he freaked me out tonight by barking very loudly at his reflection in the sliding glass door tonight...lol. Makes me think he'll be a good watchdog though :)

I haven't started Christmas shopping yet - thank God I don't have too many people to buy for! I should be able to start this coming weekend, and we'll have Shannon, so I'll get her to help me. Having her around every other weekend sure has been nice...and well worth the hassles we went through to get this thing with her mother straightened out!

Three websites for you to check out, in light of the holidays. They're coupon sites...hope you find one you can use!

http://www.currentcodes.com/

http://www.couponcabin.com/

http://www.dealhunting.com/

22 days and counting

2005-11-27T06:56:00.000-06:00

Well, in 22 days, we'll be able to start moving into our house!

The bitter taste left over from the closing has started to subside as our excitement begins to build. We went furniture shopping on Friday - I've wanted new furniture for quite awhile and since we aren't going to be smoking in the new house, I didn't want to take smoke-smelling furniture into it. We found a set at Rooms to Go, consisting of a sofa and what they call a "chair and a half". Both pieces are recliners, which Scott and I both wanted. They will be delivered to the house on the 20th. Of course, we paid more than I wanted to, but that's fine - hopefully, it'll be the last set of furniture we buy for 10 years or so.

Our conversations are now peppered with ideas and plans. Since our ultimate goal is to build a new house on that land, we've been looking at floor plans and we've decided to go with a log cabin look - and this is the design we really want. This is 2-3 years away though.

I think I'll spend today packing some more stuff. Most of it's already in storage, but there's quite a bit more that could be packed up now as we're getting closer!

Pictures of the house

2005-11-19T18:55:00.000-06:00

Sue, just for you and anyone else who may want to look :)

http://photobucket.com/albums/b127/honey4evr/Our%20House/

For password, use helen

Homeowners....at last

2005-11-19T11:36:00.000-06:00

The closing was painful, very stressful, broke us completely financially (I'll be bouncing checks until Thursday), but it's over. We'll move in starting the evening of December 18.

The lender kept putting off getting the loan docs to the title company - they were supposed to be there Tuesday, then Wednesday, then Thursday, and still were not there until noon on Friday.

The seller tried to put off signing until Monday, which meant they would occupy our house until 12/21...and I just lost it. I called my father in law, who has been dealing with the seller, and raged at him. My mom is supposed to be here from California on 12/20...where the hell was I going to put her? My daughter and grandchildren are coming in from Ohio on 12/14....they'll have to stay at a hotel or with her father. It's going to cost $31 a day to board the dog and cat, while we're staying with the birds at the home of my ex-mother in law, or a friend, since we have to be out of this house on 12/10. Father in law finally called the seller and lit into him...so they showed up at closing and signed.

When we got in there to sign, the title company informed us that they needed another $2100 by certified check - and there was no branch of our bank in that town - no way to get the money. I lost it again. The title company finally, after 30 minutes of us trying to find a bank who would let us cash a check (HA!) decided that we could wire them the money on Monday morning.

I truly don't think I could have taken another delay or another problem...I'd have been fitted for a straight jacket if there had been.

Thank God it's all over....and I swear, I will never go through this again. Next house we buy will be EMPTY.

The closing

2005-11-10T16:59:00.000-06:00

*sigh*

We didn't close. Our landlady must have decided she didn't want us to move or something, because she intentionally sat on the paperwork she needed to fill out and send back to the lender...hence, loan documents didn't issue today.

We took our certified check for the anticipated closing costs to the title company and signed another extension to "on or before November 18th", terrified all the while that the seller wouldn't agree to it.

We found out a little while ago that he did agree to it, but that he now wants a firm 30 days to move, but he will absolutely be out on that 30th day. Fine...not a problem. We had gone up just last night and gave the landlady a check that paid us to up 12/10. Everyone now believes we'll sign loan docs on Tuesday morning, so we'll have to give them another 3 days of rent, and not have a week to clean the way we had planned.

What I'd really like to do is choke the life out of my landlady, but of course, I can't do that. She told our loan broker that she didn't have the lease in front of her and couldn't verify how long we lived here...we moved in in September of 2003....2.2 years ago, and she only needed to verify 12 months. If she hates us, it would have made more sense to fill that paper out as fast as possible and send it to the lender by fax right away so we'd be gone. If she likes us and wants us to stay, she has a strange way of showing it. And, btw, she's a residential real estate agent for Coldwell Banker, so it's not like she didn't know how badly we needed this....and I had called her twice about it anyway....once while she apparently had the document sitting on her desk and she told me she hadn't heard from the lender. Purely evil.

We're going to go rent a storage unit in the town we're moving to, and we're going to start loading up Scott's work van with the boxes we've had packed for 2 months, and move them out there. I figure if we've done without it this long, it can stay in storage until we settle in and I'll bring a few boxes home at a time. That'll thin out the clutter around here (2/3rds of the house is in boxes scattered around my house) and we can start cleaning. Benefit: Things that were a priority to keep 2 months ago, may not be as important to keep in another 2 months.

Other than the landlady thing, I'm calmer and it's going to be ok. The landlady thing hurts to the quick...this is not some corporation...this is a woman that lives 500 yards from me and waves to me every day. We feel utterly and totally betrayed.

It wasn't supposed to be this hard!!

2005-11-04T15:06:00.000-06:00

I haven't been posting and probably needed to, if for no other reason than the therapy benefits.

Last Friday, we bought a dog from the SPCA! His name is Jonah and he's a Labrador mix, probably with Weimaraner. He is without a doubt the best dog I've ever owned. He's 7 months old, weighs 40 lbs, and is calm and gentle.

We were supposed to close on our house on October 31, but we received word that our appraiser had been unable to get out to the house - couldn't hook up with the sellers, so the closing got extended until November 10. I called the sellers yesterday to let them know that our insurance agent needed to come and inspect the house and, in the course of that conversation, discovered that while they have every intention of closing on 11/10, they have NO intention of being out of the house by then, nor do they intend to pay rent to us for staying there. Contractually, of course, they can't do that; however, they let it be known that if we intended to force the issue, they would simply walk away...with our $5,000 escrow.

Needless to say, this has Scott and I completely and totally stressed out. I lost 3 lbs overnight simply because I couldn't eat and from crying (I cry when I'm stressed - and when we fight, which is occurring because of the stress). We reminded each other this morning that we love each other and this is just a house and there are more houses out there, and even if we have to wait a year to find one, we'll be just fine. It still sucks.

I'm picking Shannon up tonight after work and taking her to our house for our very first entire weekend visit! Scott and I are very excited about this, so it is a bright spot in an otherwise miserable week.

Valium, anyone?

2005-10-20T17:58:00.000-05:00

OK, so daughter #1 had her baby, daughter #2 got married, and the visitation issues with my step-daughter have been resolved to our satisfaction. The only remaining issue for October is closing on the house. The loan app has been signed, but not yet approved. We have all the money we will need if we get the 100% loan, but if it's only a 90-95% loan, we're going to have to go to Scott's dad...which we really do NOT want to do! If it's a 95% loan, we'll only need $2000, but I still don't want to go to him!

We're pretty much packed, but I intend to do some more this weekend and try to get us down to just the stuff we'll need for the next 11 days. The house is supposed to be move-in ready when we get the keys on the 31st. Scott swears we're showing up for the closing with the fully packed moving van! I'm delighted that I can't take any time off work - he'll be doing most of the move himself ;)

I'm a little worried about how the birds are going to take this - moving them could cause some issues like more night-frights (which Ozzie gets more frequently than I like) and it could also cause some feather plucking. Nobody does that now and I hope they're secure enough about us that the move doesn't make them start!

So yeah, a little stressed, but nothing that 10 mg of Valium couldn't help! ;)

She'll carry on

2005-10-16T08:33:00.000-05:00

On October 13, at 10:00 a.m., my newest grandchild, Kathryn Lynn was born. She weighed in at 8 lbs., 10 oz. and was 21 inches long. My daughter was in labor for only 7 hours, and only pushed for 12 minutes, and after only 3 good pushes, presented our little beauty.

After packing to come home yesterday, I sat holding Kathryn. As I gazed at her, I realized I wanted to live long enough to see the young woman she is destined to become.

My nickname for my grandmother was the "Ice Queen". She was a very hard woman who, upon being told by my mother "I love you", responded with "God bless you". Love wasn't apparently part of her make-up. Needless to say, being raised by the Ice Queen, my mother wasn't exactly the most loving parent around, and she did try, but unconditional love was not something I experienced.

I know the mistakes I've made with my children, but thankfully, they received enough good from me that they have become very loving and generous adults. I can't wait to see Kathryn (and her big brother Alex, and their cousin Alyssa) grow into adults who were loved unconditionally. My daughters are such better mothers than I was, so I apparently did something right!

I doubt seriously that I'll live long enough to see Kathryn become a mother, but I was totally in awe as I sat looking at that sweet baby face, and realized that at some time in the distant future, she will tell her children stories about her grandmother (me). I pray that the stories Kathryn shares with her children about me will include lots of humor and tons of love!

The Food Whore

2005-10-04T22:20:00.000-05:00

I stumbled across a blogger today that has kept me giggling for hours. It's called The Food Whore. The author is a chef and caterer, and the blogger details her "tricks" (jobs). It's a great read, but don't visit for the first time when you're short on time...you'll want to stay for hours!

I must warn you that she's fond of expletives, so if that bothers you, I guess you'll need to miss this one.

Weekend update

2005-10-02T20:59:00.000-05:00

Friday Night: My step-daughter Jennifer had her wedding rehearsal. It was a long evening, but a lot of fun. It was great to see old friends and family.

Saturday: The wedding was absolutely beautiful, although most of the people there had been there the night before! My son-in-law's family is very nice, and we had a great time.

Scott's holds my family up as a beacon of how a divorced family should be. In attendance was my ex-husband's first wife and her current boyfriend, me and Scott, my ex and his Significant Other, my ex's father and step-mother, and mother and step-father...you almost needed a scorecard to keep up! We all get along well and we even took the first wife and her boyfriend to the bus station and airport (they came separately). It's pretty cool that we all managed to make this work...I think it's very good for the kids, even though they're grown. I think it teaches them a valuable lesson for "just in case" their own marriages fail, and what they need to do to make it good for their own kids.

So, a happy weekend all around!

I love my TIVO!

2005-09-27T17:20:00.000-05:00

OK...so it's not really a Tivo. It's a DVR from Direcway, but it works very much like a Tivo. I set it up to record tv shows that I want to see but can't watch at the time they're on.

For instance, I love the show "House, M.D." It is in its second season and it's an absolutely awesome show...catch it if you can. It's on tonight as a matter of fact! But because we're supposed to have company tonight, I won't be able to watch it...so Tivo to the rescue!

Now I'll share a secret with you....don't tell anyone else...*looking around*...

I am a junkie...a soap opera junkie. I love General Hospital and One Life to Live and have them both set up on the Tivo to record every day. Granted, sometimes I'm running 6 weeks behind, but then I let Scott know it's time for a marathon weekend and he lets me veg in front of the tv all weekend.

I love technology and this little device is one of the best ones ever designed, in my book!

Rita fades away

2005-09-24T20:16:00.000-05:00

Well, other than some wind gusts of nearly 50 mph, we didn't see hide nor hair of Rita! From all the data I had at my disposal (which was considerable), the storm was headed in our direction and missed us by about 5 miles, then moved north and east.

It never once occurred to me to check and see if the new house was getting any rain! DUH! But we're sure hoping it did...the lake was really low when we were out there last Sunday.

Anyway, glad that's over!!

By the way, if you'd like to take a look at the lake house, you can go here. If it asks for a password, use helen.

Weather update

2005-09-24T11:51:00.000-05:00

Well, we've seen no rain yet, but our winds are currently 14-22 mph, with gusts of 38. Weatherbug advises me that we're formally under a flood watch. The sky starting to get darker. We'll stay online until it becomes unsafe to do so, or we lose our satellite connection - whichever occurs first.

Since I started typing this, our winds are now 18-22 consistently...I guess it's coming!

Scott's outside, doing some last minute nailing down and clearing. Some of the trees are bending pretty good...I'm hoping none come down, because it'll either be a car or the house that they hit! (And I just got my car back last Monday from the accident...argh!)

Riding the storm out

2005-09-23T17:10:00.000-05:00

We live outside of Dallas...about 40 minutes southeast, and we're about 90 minutes west (and slightly north) of Tyler. We're definitely going to get some "weather" this weekend - it just remains to be seen what that weather will entail. For sure, some rain.

We get hit pretty hard out here in the country when there's a good storm over Dallas, so my worry is possibly flooding. We're in a mobile home, in a valley, and for some unknown reason, all of the neighborhood's culverts drain under our driveway and into our yard (hey, we're just renting, so please don't think we planned this crap). We're the standard 4 feet off the ground, so it would take a lot of water for us to get officially flooded, and I don't think we'll get that much. But, it wouldn't take much rain for us to get to 5-10" deep...NOT fun.

We have discussed what we would take if we decide we need to bug out - obviously the birds and Misty, some clothes, food and water, both computers and two drawers out of our filing cabinets, because they hold very important papers, and, if possible, the karaoke equipment. We figure we could be out the door in an hour or less.

I'm guessing we'll probably lose our satellite internet and our satellite TV, since both dishes point to the southern sky.

Scott's on call this weekend. I'm hoping he doesn't get any calls, but several of the company's accounts are condos, apartments and hotels...not much hope he won't. I'm just hoping everyone else is off the roads he's driving.

Countdown

2005-09-21T21:15:00.000-05:00

I noticed tonight that next week (Sept. 27), this blogger will be a year old. I’m not sure that I’m accomplishing anything with my blogging, but since I never had a clearly defined goal for it, I guess it’s just become a place to hold some thoughts and memories. Since I’m worried that I’ll end up with Alzheimer’s, someone please lead me to the computer, pull up my blog, and make me read.

Sometimes I read blogs that make an impact on the internet community. There are those who digest the news and state their opinion on it – and I find those interesting, but doing something like that just isn’t me.

There are those who aren’t afraid to put out every aspect of their childhood (or adult) traumas for the world to see. My own childhood (and adult) traumas were pretty significant and I don’t mind talking about them, but I don’t think I could put them here on Life in Texas…because I have a lot of people visiting these days that I’m not prepared to share these stories with. No offense if that statement strikes a chord with you – there are very few people that I can share them with. Maybe, someday, I should start a second blogger just to deal with those traumas.

*sigh*

Eh…enough of that for tonight.

About Ozzie...

2005-09-18T18:51:00.000-05:00

OK, so tonight we’re testing out Blogger for Word. Supposedly, you can publish right from Word, so we’ll see.

I’ve decided to write about Ozzie tonight since she’s been the most persistent of the birds lately.

Ozzie is a Senegal Parrot, sex undetermined at this time, but we call her a “her”. I truly suspect that she’s a he, but we won’t do her DNA test until after the first of the year. She will be 2 years old in March.

We picked Ozzie out when we got to our breeder’s house to pick up Lucy, who we had already committed to buy. Ozzie was in her own cage next to Lucy. I leaned down to say hi to her and she kissed me – and it was love at first sight for both of us. ;)

As far as the noise level goes, Ozzie is the quietest of all the birds. She frequently does “contact calls” when I’m out of the room, wanting to know where I am at all times, but her “voice” is pretty quiet. She doesn’t talk, other than “Hi Sammy”, which she has picked up from the Sammy the cockatiel (who also says “Hi Sammy”…and nothing else). She has, however, starting imitating sounds around the house like the microwave beep and the refrigerator door squeal, Sammy’s chirping sounds, and she makes kissing sounds…all of which have only appeared in the past 2-3 months.

Ozzie LOVES her mommy! She doesn’t want to have much to do with Scott and only quietly tolerates him holding her or feeding her. But where I’m concerned…I’m the bee’s knees! As mentioned above, she whistles contact calls to me all the time I’m out of the room. Her favorite place to be is on me or on my desk chair while I’m working. On a daily basis (and several times a day), she quietly manages to get off the cage she shares with Lucy, and walks across the floor to my desk. If Scott sees her before I do, he’ll do the shark-getting-ready-to-attack theme from Jaws and I’ll know she’s coming my way. But more often than not, I’ll hear a peep (or worse, feel a touch on my foot…she’s gone flying more than once!!) and look down to find her under my chair, looking up at me and waiting for me to pick her up and put her on my chair.

Last night, Ozzie managed to get from her cage to Sammy’s cage. She figured out how to open his door (NOT an easy trick!) and was sitting inside his cage…she’s a pretty smart little girl ;)

Ozzie is definitely the most picky of all the birds, as far as food. She has no interest in pasta, chips, crackers or bread, and she despises fresh fruit and vegetables. She wants only her seed mix, peanuts, and the occasional pistachio.

If you’ve ever thought you’d like a parrot, a Senegal is a good place to start. They can be bought for $250-$300, and are a medium sized bird – larger than a cockatiel, but smaller than a cockatoo. There are some Senegals who are very good talkers, and some who never talk, and I don’t think there’s any way of determining who will or won’t. If you can live with the fact they may never talk, they’re very sweet companions, and I wouldn’t hesitate to get another Senegal.

Opinionistas

2005-09-13T12:38:00.000-05:00

I read constantly. Words are food for my brain and it's always hungry for more. My list of blogs on the left side of this page continues to grow and I've found a new one. Opinionistas is the blogger of a female Manhattan associate attorney who writes about her ongoing struggles working for a large NY megafirm...it could even be the NY office of the firm I work for, who knows? I've been reading her for a couple of months now, and with each read, renew my thanks that I evaluated my life years ago and decided that, despite the encouragement of family and friends (who no doubt looked forward to free legal advice), working as an attorney was not my cup of tea.

Anyway, those of you who may be legal minded in some form or another may enjoy her blog and therefore, I pass it along to you.

Changes

2005-09-12T21:45:00.000-05:00

I mentioned several months ago that one of my bosses (the male) and I had had a falling out. At the instigation of several of my work friends, I finally, last month, made the first move, being open and friendly with him, and he responded in kind, so things have gotten much better. But at the same time, it always felt like the other shoe was getting ready to drop, and I've tried to block it out of my mind because I have enough to worry about right now.

When I arrived at work this morning, I opened my Outlook and there was an email from one of our human resources people, informing me that I had been reassigned. I would keep my two female attorneys and pick up a new associate that just started today, also female (not that it really matters...or, hm, maybe it does), and the male attorney would be paired with someone else.

This made for an utterly wonderful day. I like this boss as a person, but our work styles are so vastly different that it was very frustrating for me to work for him. He's one of those that you ask "what time is it?" and he proceeds to give you a two hour dissertation on how man realized that some method of keeping time was needed, followed by how watches are made, before finally telling you it's 3:15. But then, if I needed instructions on how to do a project for him, he couldn't give me more than 5 words on the topic. I think I'll be a much happier employee now :)

~~~~~~~~~

Judging from my stats, I'm starting to get a few more visitors these days! That's kind of exciting for me. I know this blog isn't a hotbed of information, and most of what I blog about is probably pretty boring. But I do appreciate everyone who spends time here visiting. Feel free to leave comments!

Another successful karaoke party!

2005-09-11T20:49:00.000-05:00

It's a little scary sometimes, inviting people from different places to come to a karaoke party. You're never sure whether the blending of personalities will work to create a fun time or not. We also are never entirely sure how many people are actually going to show up.

But it worked well. We ended up with a good group of people, and Scott and I cooked up the fish that we caught Mother's Day and the weekend of Scott's grandmother's funeral.

I think everyone had a decent enough time ;)

Was able to put $325 into the savings account this week. That was a good feeling, and now brings us up to $1,000 in savings. Now I only need another $7,000-13,000 for the closing costs...LOL. I wish I didn't have to put out $500 for my deductible on my car next week...I want to bank it!!

Some good news

2005-09-09T10:14:00.000-05:00

After brawling with Verizon for several days, they have agreed to reduce a $262 bill by $150. This occurred after Scott's cell phone was stolen and we didn't know it for 3 weeks. (Yeah, he used it a lot! LOL) Every little bit helps!

The man we're using to clean up our credit is definitely getting some good results. There were about 10-15 duplicate accounts on our credit records, and they've been eliminated...I'm dying to see our current credit scores, but I've been advised to wait a month to see them. Time is flying by...I'm still terrified we won't be able to get enough done to get a decent interest rate on our home loan! Only 6 weeks till escrow closes!!

Getting connected

2005-09-07T13:52:00.000-05:00

While I was at Verizon Wireless today, preparing to fight with them over Scott's stolen cell phone, an older couple came in, and were talking to me while we all waited in line. They were from New Orleans and had lost their cell phones in the flooding and needed new ones. They appeared to be having much better luck with Verizon than I was, and were rapidly issued new phones. I hope they find people to call.

They told me they were staying at Reunion Arena, where most of the Katrina victims in Dallas are being housed. The woman told me they're just bored beyond belief - that there's nothing for them to do but wait. They told me they won't be going back to New Orleans...ever. There's nothing for them there.

They also told me that they were very grateful for everything that is being done for them and that they've been getting the supplies being donated. These were the first victims I had spoken with face to face, and it did my heart good to hear that the supplies are actually getting to them. I have some serious concerns about the Red Cross and their "give us money" line and not accepting any supplies. The Salvation Army has been accepting supplies and they're getting delivered...weehaw :)

Finally cooling down!

2005-09-05T08:37:00.000-05:00

Dallas has had several 100+ degree days this summer...considerably more than last summer. I've noticed that the past few days have had that "Autumn" smell and feel to them...despite being 95 degrees.

I checked out the 10 day forecast this morning on weather.com and happily, there's not one day showing higher than 95 degrees. In fact, we have a storm coming in next weekend, which our yard desparately needs - with gas going sky high, watering the lawn and raising the water bill is very low on my list of priorities! My outdoors plants are looking pretty grim and I don't think many are going to make it.

Back in California, when I left there, kids started school after Labor Day. I don't know if that's still the case - my kids have long since graduated. Here in Texas, they start the middle of August. It's always seemed a little inhumane to stick them in poorly air-conditioned rooms when it's still 100 degrees outside, but hey, nobody's died so I guess it's ok.

September is always calming for me...cooler temps, the occasional storm, the smells of fall coming in...the lower power bills ($541 last month kids!). September this year means another month closer to closing on our house. Trust me, a 90 day escrow is not fun! But now we're down to 55 days. Packing has begun in earnest. I can't wait until the move is complete...and watching winter settle in on the lake :)

$1 donation to Katrina victims

2005-09-04T11:42:00.000-05:00

The Oxygen Network is giving a dollar donation to the hurricane victims for every person who signs up at this site! Just name and email and zip code and AGE. Please go and sign up! It only takes a second and it will be meaningful to a lot of people! Click on the title link of the post.

The Interdictor

2005-09-04T08:39:00.000-05:00

Today a friend of mine posted this link http://www.livejournal.com/users/interdictor. It is the blogger of an employee of DirectNIC.com, located in NO. He rode the hurricane out and is still holed up at 650 Poydras, giving commentary on what's going on there. It's a pretty interesting look at Katrina from the inside.

Just the fact that they stayed online through all of this is a testament to the company itself!

Helping out

2005-09-03T23:46:00.000-05:00

Scott, his daughter and I went shopping today (thank God for plastic). We spent about $200 on socks, diapers, razors, tampons, individual snack items, gloves, flashlights, etc. and then drove down to the American Airlines Center where several of the radio stations were camped out, along with the Salvation Army.

What started as about 50 people quickly grew as one out of every two cars that came to deliver supplies stayed. All the goods had to be sorted out, and then loaded into a truck.

Because it was hot, and I'm so susceptible to heat stroke, we could only stay a couple of hours, but what a great feeling to be helping in some very small way to the relief effort. A true drop in the bucket, but each drop adds up.

We're beginning to think that this tragedy in NO is going to affect us more personally. As the gas prices steadily increase, we're coming to the realization that we may not be able to afford to live 45 miles one-way from work. Riding together is quickly becoming mandatory, rather than the option it once was.

Find Katrina

2005-09-02T06:02:00.000-05:00

FindKatrina.com is another site set up to help locate missing victims of Katrina.

Please check these boards if you can - someone may be looking for you, or you may know the whereabouts of someone who is on the missing list.

NowPublic has set up a missing persons board to help victims of Hurricane Katrina

2005-09-01T12:07:00.000-05:00

NowPublic has set up a missing persons board to help victims of Hurricane Katrina find those who go missing during the storm.

If you want to publish the photograph of someone you are looking for, please go to http://www.nowpublic.com/node/17228.

I've been tagged!

2005-08-31T17:28:00.000-05:00

OK...let's see how this plays out.

1. What is the ratio of sexy panties to granny panties currently in your possesion?

I have NO granny panties in my drawer. Got rid of them all after I met Scott. Every single pair I own (which is about 20) came from Victoria's Secret.

2. Pretend you won one of those "Make your dream come true" deals that Oprah is always giving away. What would you ask for?

I'd ask for the new house to paid for in full, along with a houseful of new furniture!

3. Describe your high school days in one word.

Weird

4.If you could shag any celebrity in the world who would be your top three picks?

George Clooney
Brad Pitt (even though the rumor is that he has a teenie weenie)
Antonio Banderas (YUM...have you seen that man's ass??)

5. If you had all the money in the world, more money than you could spend in four lifetimes, would you eat some?

No way...there's no telling where that's been!

6. Tag three people.

Wisshes (she's going to kill me).
TheFamilyMan (he's going to kill me, too)
Onderland (oh well, 3 for 3)

Kick a man when he's down

2005-08-31T12:07:00.000-05:00

As New Orleans and Gulfport try to pull themselves together, there are battles being waged against it by the absolute scum of the earth - those low-lifes who feel free to plunder businesses and homes which miraculously survived the hurricane and subsequent flooding.

What is the logic behind breaking into a store and stealing 9 pairs of sneakers? What is it that causes a presumably civilized man to turn into an animal in the face of disaster? What line of thinking leads one to believe that they are somehow entitled to things that don't belong to them, just because the city is in shambles??

Am I just naive by believing that after a crisis, people should be concerned about others sharing their space, rather than how much money or how many things they can steal? Isn't that like kicking a man when he's down?

And the price-gougers should be drawn and quartered!

It truly saddens me when I see what this world has become.

In any event, if you want to help the flood victims, here are a couple of links:

American Red Cross

The Salvation Army

They don't need clothes or shoes or food or water...they need MONEY. If you have it...give...and give some more.

Blessings

2005-08-30T17:25:00.000-05:00

While this string of unfortunate luck is with us, I need to keep in mind that there are many blessings as well.

My daughter Kristi is 7 weeks from her due date.
My daughter Jennifer is getting married in 5 weeks.
We're buying a lake house!!
While I was in a car wreck, I wasn't badly hurt, and I'm still alive!
Despite cheating constantly on my diet, I've only gained back 3 lbs., which comes and goes.
I'm loved by many people, more than I deserve.

If I keep these thoughts in mind - I can get through anything!!

What a day sigh

2005-08-25T21:45:00.000-05:00

I was in my third accident since 08/03 today, and the second one just this year. This time an unlicensed, uninsured Hispanic National (isn't that totally PC of me?) tried to cut in front of someone else in the far right lane, reacted from almost hitting a car by overcompensating, and she came flying across the next two lanes of traffic, clipping my front end and pushing me into the retaining wall.

*sigh*

My front end is trashed, but the car is driveable. My left wrist hurts, my back hurts, my shoulder hurts, my head hurts.

The other driver was making noises like I was somehow to blame for her crossing the highway and hitting me, because I wasn't 100% sure whose face I saw in the window as she hit me (there were three adults in the car). Fortunately, I have the names and phone numbers of two witnesses who came running over to my car because they thought I was going to be pretty messed up when they got there...both terribly relieved that I wasn't cut up or broken.

The insurance company has been called, a statement given...and I just want to cry. Just yesterday morning, I finished paying off Scott's mom's car...and now we have to come up with $500 for my deductible...I'm just hoping this doesn't jeopardize the house :((

Passages and new beginnings

2005-08-24T20:00:00.000-05:00

Last Friday morning, we buried Scott's grandmother, Lillie. It was a beautiful service at the church where she had been a member most of her life. After the church service, there was a short procession to the cemetary where, thank God, they did not lower the casket in front of us...that's where I lose it. The minister said a few words and a prayer, then everyone kind of milled around and talked for a little while, then it was back to the church for lunch. First time I've been to a funeral where they fed you, but the psychology behind it has to be that during that time of sharing a meal is where the healing begins.

After the funeral, we returned to the house, where family who had not met other family members (like me) got to know us a little. Then Scott's dad, Keith, said: "The best way I can think of to honor my mother....is to fish!" Scott, Keith, his wife Cathy, and I headed down to the pond, where we proceeded to catch 15 good-sized bass....and of those 15, I caught 6!! We ate them Saturday night for dinner and I swear I've never eaten better tasting fish ;)

During the last week when I was completely out of control on my eating, I put 6 lbs back on. Fortunately, most of it must have been water, because I've already lost 2.5 of it. Won't be doing THAT again!

Nothing new on the house yet. Carolyn, one of the attorneys I work for, has been going over the paperwork on it, making sure all the i's are dotted and t's are crossed...mental note: send her flowers. Scott and I have begun daydreaming about things we want to change in the house, and in what order. LOL...we've even begun picking out paint colors.

One of our biggest questions is...where are the birds going to live? The most logical spot for them may disappear if we knock out a wall we want gone. Hm...Our guests may have to share a room with them ;) (Never happen, trust me! We'll figure out something.)

That's it for now....Life in Texas...it's for the birds!

Interest is up!

2005-08-17T11:52:00.000-05:00

Woohooo! The interest rate was raised on my savings account to 3.30%! Sure, it's only a few cents here and there, but they add up!

If you're interested in opening an account, please email me and I'll send you a referral link - you'll get $25 FREE just for opening an account, and I'll get $10 FREE, because you did!

Update 8/15/05

2005-08-15T19:01:00.000-05:00

The problem with not posting daily is that you then have to do update posts, and something inevitably gets left out. I'm hoping I don't do that now.

Scott's grandmother passed away last night at 7 p.m. She was 86 years old and lived a long happy life. She's been ill for two years, and was ready to go. She died at home, surrounded by her children and grandchildren. She just went to sleep and didn't wake back up. She'll be terribly missed. We drove up to Oklahoma yesterday and got there about 1 p.m., so Scott was able to see her before she passed away.

We've been seeing Shannon regularly. Things are not smooth just yet, but hopefully the issues will get resolved soon. We love spending time with her, and she seems to enjoy being with us.

At our monthly karaoke party on Saturday night, our dear friend, Linda, handed me a card and said, "I have a gift for you. It's not much, but I wanted you to have it" and handed me an envelope. Inside the envelope was a card and five $100 bills! I immediately started crying and threw my arms around her. There was a split second battle in my head saying "protest, give it back to her, it's much too generous" with the other side of it being "she wouldn't give it if she couldn't afford it and didn't want to, and to protest would just be a waste of time". I just thanked her profusely. It will go immediately into the bank and then be transferred to the savings account. Linda, if you ever read this...thank you so very much.

So, progress on the house continues. We now have a title policy, we're building our savings account for the closing costs, and we're starting to do some serious daydreaming. The escrow company was supposed to send me some documents which I haven't received yet, but hopefully that doesn't indicate any problems.

My daughter Kristi got a contract on her house today - they have to be out by September 30. Her baby is due October 13. Wonder when I should book my flight for? ;)

As a reminder, if you'd like to open an online savings account, where you'll get a FREE $25 for signing up, please email me. I'll get $10 for referring you and boy, could I use the money! LOL

Also, the jewelry ad to the left of this page is also a money maker for me. If you purchase a piece of jewelry for only the small shipping and handling, I'll receive a small commission. I'm going to be adding a PayPal donation button until we get moved. If you'd like to help out in any small way, feel free. If not, hey, that's fine too! (We need $14,000....I'm not proud...lol)

Feelings

2005-08-10T06:18:00.000-05:00

Despite being a packrat, I've been fairly transient in my life. For example, when I was 20 or so, I applied to work for the IRS. Part of their application was the requirement that you list your addresses for the past 10 years. At that point in time, I had 14 different addresses...and only one of those was my mother's. I can't count how many times I moved between the age of 20 and the age of 39, in 1995. I've moved nine times since 1995 and I'm preparing to move again, making it 10 times in 10 years. I finally got collapsible boxes a few moves ago, so when I unpacked, they went into a closet somewhere, waiting for the next move.

I hate moving. I hate packing everything up, and taking it back down. I hate that things get broken during a move. So, the packrat in me goes through trauma with each move. And here I am again, having to sort through my books, and throwing more away. They aren't worth anything - old secretarial handbooks, for example, but I just hate having to do it.

I'm really hoping we stay in this house forever - but I know that won't happen. Part of our purpose in buying this place is to improve it, and resell it for much more than we paid for it in 5 years, or so.

Anybody else out there feel like this?

These "hates" are very short-term, however. I'll get over them soon enough, when they'll be replaced with the excitement of owning my first home, of living on a lake, learning a new town. I actually have fun getting lost in a new town...I look at it as an adventure, because you always learn about some place you might not normally have looked for. It'll be way cool, sitting on our dock at night, drinking a glass of wine, my fishing pole in the water, as I watch the sun's setting rays on the water. Every night after work will seem like a vacation, with all the stresses of the day behind me. We'll be able to open our bedroom window and listen to the water lapping on the shore.

Please God - don't let something stand in our way of owning this house.

Katie

2005-08-06T11:36:00.000-05:00

Katie is the youngest of our "fids" (feathered kids). Another Quaker Parrot, she was born January 21, 2005, and is still learning how to do things, and trying find her place within our family.

Katie decided when we brought her home that she was the "top dog" and that hasn't changed much. She will knock anybody off their cage - except Ziggy. She's not very sure of him just yet, so she still approaches him with caution.

Katie is curious about everything, and like most birds, loves anything shiny. I forget about this when I come home from work and head to her cage without removing my necklace or earrings. I have to force her beak open to remove my pendant, so you'd think I'd learn to take them off before going to her cage!

As I mentioned in Ziggy's post, Katie has learned several of his words. She will rarely say them directly to us, rather, she will sit in her cage (irritated with me because I won't let her roam anymore) and let loose a string of words - all of them Ziggy's! Last night, I heard her say tickle-tickle, thank you, mommy, and ok. Like Ziggy, a lot of her words couldn't be understood. Speaking birds tend to work out their new words at volumes difficult to hear until they have it down pat - and then they save them to try out when you least expect...or least want, in some cases!

I've been working on my consistency with all the birds - trying to feed them at the same time, put them to sleep at the same time, and playing with them at the same time. One of the things that I needed to do consistently for Ziggy and Katie was to give every item its name, and describe my actions verbably - it's important because it helps them understand what's going on and what I'm doing. Since I started working on being more consistent with them, Katie's training has been going much better. Instead of throwing herself at her cage door, I will tell her "open the door", and she will sit and wait for me to do just that, and then will step-up on my finger quite prettily. She's getting it :)

I'm not sure how the birds are going to react to our move. They'll have a pretty area to hang out in, looking out the window towards the lake. Eventually, I'd like to have Scott build an aviary for them, so they'll all be housed together, but I have to see proof first that they'll all get along in one large cage. Could be interesting!

Wanna come help me pack? :)

2005-08-05T19:41:00.000-05:00

OK, so we're moving along with the premise that we actually have bought that house, and now we're starting to take mental notes around this house, trying to figure out what we want to get rid of, and where we're going to put the things we keep in the new place.

Scott and I are both packrats. We hate to throw things away. He told me once that he had no intention of moving the box of empty boxes that my ex had been trying to get me to throw away for years. I refused to give it up - you just never know when you're going to need a small empty box. Actually, the "box of boxes" isn't always the same boxes - I use the ones I have and refill when necessary. Now...he tells me that, and yet, for every piece of computer equipment that we bought for two years (which was considerable - we built everyone in his family new computers in that two years), he kept the box the piece came in! We finally had a bonfire this summer, where we emptied the closet he kept those boxes in and burned the damn things ;)

So, this is something we're obviously wrestling with. Both of us are going to have to get rid of a lot of the stuff that we've been hanging on to for years. I've been carting around my daughter's stuff that she left with me 4 years ago when she got married. Now she's getting it all back.

All the pictures, drawings, journals, report cards, honor roll certificates, track medals and ribbons from my three kids that I've been hanging on to "until they grew up" are now going to be distributed to them - and they can decide whether they want to keep the stuff or not. That's a weird feeling, I have to admit, to think that they've grown up enough to give it to them. Can anyone else relate to that?

I'm going to have to get rid of most of my books - another arrow in my heart, but we just don't have the room, and I've read them all anyway. I'm sure there's many I won't want to give up and that's fine, I'll find a place for them...someday.

I feel like I'm releasing my past - all part of a new life, I guess.

$14,000

2005-08-04T09:59:00.000-05:00

I asked Scott's step-mom yesterday (she's brokering our loan) for an estimate of what she thought our closing costs would be on the house.

$14,000 was her response.

I was stressing over the idea of coming up with $2,700, and now I'm looking at $14,000?

Anybody want to open an ING Direct Savings Account? It pays 3.15% interest, which is more than my bank pays. If so, let me know - you'll get a free $25, and I'll get a free $10.

Anybody want to join a 'Get Paid to Read' program? If you're diligent and can stand the constant onslaught of email and associated clicking, you can earn up to $1.00 per day. Let me know if you're interested and I'll give you the sign up link.

Life on the edge

2005-08-02T20:57:00.000-05:00

I can't believe how stressed out I am!

Work: Busier than ever, I'm on the go from the moment I hit the door until I leave, and I'm looking at overtime on Saturday :(

Home: Stressing hard over the new house. I'm just not sure we're going to be able to come up with the $2700 in closing costs, so I'm worrying about it constantly.

Pets: Ozzie has decided to start biting, which makes me want to hold her less, which makes her want to bite more...and around we go.

Weight: I'm thinking about quitting Nutrisystem, so I can contribute that money ($250ish per month) to the closing costs...fortunately, my weight is still going down.

So, no happy upbeat posts right now...hopefully soon.

Emotional rollercoaster

2005-07-30T07:24:00.000-05:00

It's been a really difficult week. After putting an offer on the lake house, and it being accepted, the seller tells us that he had another buyer willing to pay full price. We had to wait to see if the seller would accept that offer, and we finally got the call saying it was ours. Then, we get the news that we probably can't get 100% financing, and Scott's dad started sounding iffy about whether he was going to help with the down payment.

Finally, by yesterday, we got the contract signed, so at least the home is off the market. We put our $5,000 into escrow - and I immediately started having a major anxiety attack, complete with chest pains, heartburn, headache, etc. Last night, after seeing all of this, Scott ran us a nice hot bubble bath and broke open a bottle of champagne that we had received for our wedding a year ago and which we were holding for a celebration.

Financing still isn't in place, but at the very least, we'll be able to get an 80/20 loan and Scott's dad did confirm verbally that he'll give us whatever we need. We've got the house on a 90 day escrow and we'll close on Scott's favorite holiday - Halloween!

If the sellers find their new home and close escrow in 30 days, they'll let us know and we can turn in notice here where we rent, and move into the new home, paying them rent until our escrow closes.

What was nice was going to get the contract from the sellers yesterday and finding out that the guy that was willing to pay full price HAD come up with the money, but they chose us - because they had already given their word, and because they thought we would love the house more. They're right :)

In the course of all of this, I had gotten down to 178.8 lbs...and now I'm back up to 181.5....grrrr!!

Home Sweet Home

2005-07-24T07:46:00.000-05:00

Scott and his dad (Keith) looked at the mobile we were interested in and Keith wasn't impressed. He basically implied to us that if we wanted to buy a mobile home, we couldn't expect much help from him, but if we were interested in a real home, lots of help was to be had.

While they were out running around looking at properties, they found a great house, ON THE LAKE!! I was resistent when Scott told me about it on the phone, but we went and looked at it Friday night and it's wonderful! It's 4 bedrooms, 1 bath, with two big storage sheds in the back that look like little houses, and we'll probably use them as guest rooms. We'll lose one bedroom early on, as we'll knock the wall out between it and the master bedroom, so we'll have one huge master. It has a wet dock and boat house, so when we get our boat, we're set to go!

It's smaller than I wanted and I'll have to get rid of a lot of stuff, but it has lots of room for development. It is 1.5 acres, with .5 acre running behind the guy next door…who desperately wants to buy it. We’ll sell it to him and use that money to build onto the house. It was listed for $145k. We made an initial offer of $130k, but he wouldn't let it go for under $140k....so we accepted it!

It's an hour from my office to the house, so that's a drawback, but it's not a bad drive...I did it Friday night. It's an extra 15 miles beyond what I drive now, but I can handle it.

What's cool is being right ON the water!! Scott and I have always said we wanted to live on the water, and now we will!

We couldn't be more excited and I cried when the word came down that the offer was accepted. Of course, now the hard part comes - making it through escrow and moving...yuck!

Not sure what possessed me

2005-07-20T21:15:00.000-05:00

As I've mentioned before, I'm a newlywed. Scott and I just celebrated our first anniversary July 11. As a newlywed, even though I'm 49, I do feel compelled to grant my husband's desires...and the man loves for me to wear lingerie.

So, since I've been losing weight, I try to pick up something new here and there, that he likes.

The other night, I met him and his work buddies after hours for an adult beverage...or two....or three. It was over a long enough period of time that I was "happy", but not drunk. So when Scott suggested we go over to the nearest "adult toy" store, I was game. Giggly, but game.

We look over the selection, and I found a couple that I kinda liked, but he found one he really liked. I looked at it dubiously, since it was a "One Size Fits All", and I know that those don't fit me. But what the hell, I'm giggly and wanting to satisfy my spouse. We buy it.

A couple of days later, it occurs to me that we had bought it and the bag was still in Scott's van. I send him out for it and he brings it in, very smiley. I took the bag into the bedroom and started to put the outfit on over my head, when it becomes very apparent that I could drop another 40 lbs and never be able to wear this thing...the...uh...cups on it are like a size A and I'm a C, and there's no pretending my way through it...it does not fit.

What do I do with it now? The adult toy shop isn't going to take it back. I guess there's always ebay, but do they allow adult content??

Mental note to self: Quit buying "One Size Fits All". It's a lie, and they will never fit you, no matter how thin you get.